Shenanigans and Such

Well it's been quite a few weeks. I'm not sure where to start, really. Hrm...

You Can Still See the Stars in Seattle made it to bestseller (Yes, i was #1 in the UK again. Yay!) And i'm super happy for all of the positive feedback I've gotten from Andy's story. I've been hearing from so fucking awesome readers who really make putting my work out there worth it. That's probably the coolest part of all of this: the readers. You guys make me swoon.

I contracted Trust the Cut with LooseId and so far have been told it will receive a June release. I'm super stoked to let you guys read it because it's my biggest project by far and it's my baby. I really REALLY worked hard on Jesse and Tucker's story so I'm super stoked as we start the editing process.

Working on some SOOPER SEKRIT projects that may be announced soon with a ballin' ass friend of mine. So many good things lined up, i just don't know what to do with myself. I'll be at the Grabby's in Chicago in May and GRL as a supporting author in October so i'm having a red letter year, so far.

My girls Piper Vaughn and Sue N came in for the week and we did tons of Seattle things as well as a trip to the beach and getting lost where the highway ends and finding THE INTERNET. Shit you not. It's in a box in Taholah, WA being protected by a pack of shifter mutts. CREEEEEPY. Also got a hellaciously awesome outline done for my big WIP at the moment so I'm super excited to get it under way. So... I'm just stoked and excited about life all the way around these days and I owe it all to yall, readers. I'm so grateful for this and everything that's been happening in the last few months. Hope I keep giving you things you want to read. You have my undying gratitude. *fangirls all over your face*

<3k

YCSSTSIS PROLOGUE

Okay guys. Here's the last excerpt I'll do for You Can Still See The Stars In Seattle . 10 days to go!

PROLOGUE

There’s a welling up of pain that starts deep in your chest when you know you’re going to lose your shit and cry. Andy Riley knew exactly what was sitting in his chest at that moment, but he couldn’t lose it. He fucking couldn’t. No one even knew he was there, which was how he wanted it. He couldn’t make a sound because he couldn’t draw attention to his grief. He didn’t deserve to grieve the star that had fallen in the blink of an eye on a lonely freeway.

Andrew had loved that boy, that star, but not like he should have loved him. That’s why he’d been flying. Derek Roberts had flown down that damn black road then straight up to become just another patch of darkened sky.

No one knew what Andrew knew.

Andrew watched as the coffin was lowered into the ground and the parents grieved. In that moment he realized what it truly felt like to have contributed in destroying something good. Even had Derek lived, he never would have trusted the same, loved the same or touched someone the same way that he had Andrew.

Andy knew that boy had been the best he could have ever asked for, ever dreamed of, but he’d ruined everything by making Derek think he was, unfortunately for both Andy and Derek, second best. Andy fought to make him understand that he loved him, he didn’t mean to still hold on to Jacob so tightly in his heart. But it had been irrevocable. Now, it was forever.

A tear that he had struggled against rolled down Andy’s cheek as he looked at Derek’s mother, whose black dress must have been sweltering in the Southern sun. She looked very elegant and poised, until her gaze landed on Andy. She knew how deeply her son had loved Andy and she’d accepted it with open arms, though she’d never known Andy had been too cowardly to ever come out for Derek. Andy was pissed he had been spotted, mostly because he wanted to buckle under the sympathy in that wonderful woman’s gaze.

He didn’t deserve it. He was being a coward, still holding onto a hopeless crush for someone he hadn’t seen in fucking years and would probably never see again.

Andy turned and walked to his truck as other mourners surrounded Angela Roberts, slipping away before she could give him comfort he certainly couldn’t accept from of all people. He still wasn’t sure how he’d gone from trying to contain the welling pain in his chest while watching the funeral, to following the procession to the cemetery where he’d fought back vomiting on everyone. Visions of Derek’s tears as he’d fled their shared dorm room three nights ago filled his mind, and when he tried to turn his mind’s eye elsewhere it just focused on Jacob Chase.

Jacob Fucking Chase. Andy slammed the truck door hard and cranked the key in the ignition. Jacob had been one of his friends all through middle school and high school. They’d shared almost every experience together. And Andy had been hopelessly in love with him. It hurt to love the boy and know he could never have him, even when he was within touching distance every day. But Jacob had seen it.

One night after graduation Andy had not been able to stop himself from almost kissing his very straight friend. He knew love had shined from every poor of his body because he’d hoped that night was his chance. He’d had one of those inkling moments. He’d been wrong.

Jacob had shoved him back and run off into the night, much like Derek had. Andy called and texted, but he’d never seen Jacob again. Without that closure, even as he’d fell fallen hopelessly for the joy and brightness that was his college roommate Derek’s rising star, and even though that love was reciprocated more than Andrew could have hoped for, Andy had failed Derek. The unrequited hope that Jacob would one day come flying back into his life had remained steadfast. And he’d drunkenly called out Jacob’s name. After two years of loving that beautiful man, how could he do something so preposterous as to call out a straight man’s name? A man whom he had not seen in three long years?

Who destroyed a heart as wide open as Derek’s?

Andy turned the ignition over and drove as fast as he could from the cemetery, pulling into a gas station parking lot a few miles before his mother’s house. He changed out of his suit, stuffed it into a duffel bag, and then put on the gym clothes he usually wore after baseball practice—where his mother thought he’d been. He didn’t want to disillusion her. He had enough guilt for a dozen men right then and dumping that shit on his mother, while she was in the middle of a divorce from his piece of shit, abandoning father, was the last damn thing she needed. He’d caused himself his debilitating grief and he deserved to carry it around alone.

As he got back into his truck a single, body-wracking sob tore through him. He shook violently as tears streamed down his face, visions of Derek’s guileless blue eyes drowning in tears, his tousled hair, his expression feral, as he’d dressed and fled from the hurt Andy had shot through his heart. God, Andy would see that face for-fucking-ever.

He sat up straighter, shook the fuzziness of overwhelming grief out of his head and tried to pull it together. He would just have to suffer through his bone weary tiredness, the ache that only came from true grief, and he would have to ignore the way his lungs stopped mid-breath, as if trying to force him into experiencing the emotions he was not letting his brain focus on. He gritted his teeth. No more feeling sorry for himself. He turned the key in the ignition and headed off to comfort his mother. 

What's That You Hear?

Ashley Nicholas is coming. #WIP #ItsATeaser

Dreams 

Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.

-          Langston Hughes

Cover Time

You Can Still See The Stars In Seattle by Kade Boehme 

Novella Length / Available 3/15 

Cover: LC Chase

 
When Andrew Riley arrives in Seattle to work at an underprivileged school at the request of his cousin, Amanda, he finds himself sharing accommodations with her current boyfriend—his estranged high school friend, Jacob Chase. Living in close quarters and working with Jacob at the school brings Andy’s old crush on Jacob back to the surface, but for the same reasons then as now he can’t let it be known: Jacob is straight, very uptight in his morals, and now involved with Andy's cousin. Add to that the fact Andy's guilty over a betrayal to a lost love because of his infatuation for Jacob and he's convinced he shouldn't tempt fate.

Jacob Chase has loved Andy since he knew what it meant to be attracted to someone else, but nothing scared him more than when he thought Andy might return that love. Denying his feelings broke his heart, but there was no way Jacob could accept his homosexuality. So he did what all good southern boys were brought up to do: got married and had a child. Only that led to him cheating, his wife running off with their son, and Jacob trying to atone for his mistakes by living the straight and narrow with Amanda. But with Andrew is back in his life can he keep up the facade? Can finally surrendering to love show him where his future really lies, or will it destroy his chances of ever having his son in his life? Can they both get over the hurt they've caused in their search for one another?

Oh Politics.

I am, unapologetically, a true blue politics junkie. I'm guilty of Nerdy in the First Degree. (I rest my case.) I have a degree in Political Science with a minor in International Relations, working on a MA in Public Admin & Policy so I have devoted my life to not only talking the talk, but walking the walk. I never wish to be a politician (I'm much too wild and have quite too many tattoos) but I do the footwork whenever I am truly involved in or support something, not just socially but fiscally as well. However, I try to keep that out of my writing and and separate from my work because I know readers get enough of the BS in their day to day life without us writers getting all in their Kool-Aid when it comes to politics and their personal beliefs. But one of my heroes passed away this weekend and as I was just sitting around bawling my eyes out I couldn't imagine how I could be less productive than just sitting around being silent when I have a platform, no matter how small it may be.

I have been a strong advocate for LGBTQI rights since I was old enough to understand what Equality really is. (I always capitalize Equality. Get over it Grammar Nazis.) Not just Equality for LGBTQI, but for everyone. Women (any gay man not standing up for women is an idiot. They've raised us, supported us and been our beards for way too long not to get as much love as we can give 'em.), immigrants, etc. Unfortunately, us gays don't get alot of support from the people we are known to support, but since we aren't very supportive of one another (wags finger at haters. My T-boys and T-girls deserve way more love than y'all give em, and I don't mean tips at drag shows, douche bags) it's hard to blame the jerks out there. We are like the U.S. Republican Party: a bunch of crazies with a different opinion as to whom is included. Ugh, but I digress.

My whole point here is to talk about what this whole ranting, non-sensical post is about. The "Defense of Marriage Act" *scoffs*. Not exactly sure what they're defending, but we'll just keep calling it DOMA cuz as silly as the word DOMA may be it is less silly than calling such a ludicrous law the "Defense of Marriage Act". *scoffs again*

I stood in the lines in D.C., I passed out coffee and I talked to senators all morning along with other activists they day that the vote finally happened on the repeal of the policy known as "Don't Ask, Don't Tell". This was a truly important issue for me because I have many friends, family, and family in the armed services. I won't start ranting on the stupidity of our having a policy that out-dated for as long as we had it (you know we were one of the last countries to allow out service members? Like, the only other ones were, like, Iraq and Afghanistan... SERIOUSLY?! Somebody needs to smack these Evangelicals around.)

Well, thanks to alot of important people, DADT was smacked down, as it should have been long ago.

Problem.  

DOMA *says in mocking voice ... with jazz hands*

You see, there's this law in the books that says no federal agency shall recognize any marriage that is not between man and woman....... but marriage is to be decided by the states. Like, each state has the right to decide whom can marry whom. (That's right Alabama, we all know it's legal there to marry your 1st cousin. {reall... not shittin' you!} Stop balking!) That's always the go-to line for GOP lawmakers (Marriage is a state issue. Let the voters decide.) whenever questioned on DOMA these days because they know, based on popularity, DOMA would probably have been stricken 5 years ago. If it's a case of STATE rights... WTF is if doing in FEDERAL law books? That doesn't seem like a strange question.....

The President decided to stop defending DOMA because it is an OUT-DATED policy! But SOH John "Crybaby" Boehner decided to push forward, using MILLIONS of tax payer dollars, defending this policy all the way to the supreme court where they're trying to beat this sweet little old lady, Edie Windsor, and LBGTQI members of our ARMED SERVICES, who give their lives and spend time away from their families to protect our country, out of their benefits as legally married, tax paying citizens of these United States of America. (how's that for fiscal responsibility.

Now some of my biggest heroes (Lt. Col. Victor Fehrenbach, Petty Officer Joseph Rocha, and the inspiration for this rant/post Chief Warrant Officer Charlie Morgan) fought their asses off for this country. Does that mean anything for their significant others? Not legally, when it comes to benefits. DOMA says no! What a douche. Same-sex military spouses can't shop in commissary, use military housing, get benefits for themselves or their children, get the phone call if their spouse is injured... they can't even get the flag that's given to spouses at the funeral unless next of kin passes it to them. (I know Panetta just changed some of this, but there's enough that isn't made right until DOMA is repealed that it ALL chaps my ass)

This has got to end. I don't know if any of you read my blog. I don't know if any of you even like my writing. I KNOW this post wast random and raving, but I hope hope HOPE that someone will at least pay attention when I beg... do something. Put your money where your mouth is, call your senators, retweet HRC's DOMA posts... do SOMETHING. Your voice is important in American politics, no matter how defeated you may feel in it all or how jaded you've become with our leaders.

Chief Warrant Officer Charlie Morgan, one bad-ass lady and one of my biggest heroes) spent every day up until her dying day fighting for Marriage Equality and the repeal of DOMA. Her wife and daughter are now left without her and, adding insult to injury without any survivor benefits. This is ridiculous. It is unconscionable and in 2013 it is sickening. I'm going to let Rachel Maddow take it from here because I'm way too emotional and feel I'm making absolutely no sense.

Visit NBCNews.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

DO SOMETHING! You have a voice, man.

<3k

Holy Shit!

I made it to #1 on the UK bestseller list. I'm soooo absolutely stunned! (Seriously, almost threw my laptop cuz I was trynna jump up and down, y'all!) So stoked that I had to do something to thank everyone for all the support. Holding strong at #3 in the US bestseller for a week now so I totally had to do something to thank everyone sooooo.... I give you the prologue for You Can Still See The Stars In Seattle. (totally NSFW):


Excerpt:

            Jacob could focus on nothing but the sweat on the skin of the man beneath him and the way the man’s muscles worked his cock as he slid home into the willing body. It had been too long. He almost lost it from the moment he breached that hot entrance. It did not help when the man began to writhe beneath him. He was obviously a skilled lover if the way he worked those muscles was any indication.

            Jacob had finally had all he could of simply reveling in the feel of the man’s body. He was filled with the need to move, to plunder. He began a brutal thrusting. This was no exchance of love, hell they didn’t even know one another’s names/ This was a brutal taking of what needed to be fulfilled. The demon inside Jacob.

            The man’s grunt and cries with each inward plunge were delicious and Jacob was not sure how long he would last if the man kept it up so Jacob reached around and grasped the man’s hard cock in his hand and stroked him in time with the thrust of his own hips.

            Jacob loathed these encounters as much as he needed them. He never felt as alive or as whole as he did when he had a strong, powerful body taking pleasure around him, and giving pleasure in kind. It was like a high/ But he hated those stolen moments. He hated that this is all it would ever be. That meeting in a bar, the hotel rooms, the shower to clean off the freedom before he slipped home to his cage. A cage of his own design, if he admitted it.

            Jacob closed his eyes and willed the thoughts away as the man beneath him started to gasp and clench in the throes of orgasm, reeling Jacob quickly along with him. Jacob saw white and hunched over the man’s backm digging his fingers bruisingly into the man’s hips as he shot into the condom.

            The lay for a moment, still joined, panting and trying to recover from their bliss. Jacob tried always tried to steal just one more moment than he should before the flavor of the night had had enough and bolted. This man – Erik?—was obviously patient because he reached back and gently rubbed circles on Jacob’s thighs with warm hands that soothed Jacob and nearly made him weepy.

            A light suddenly cut through the dark. That wasn’t right. Both he and Erik? turned their heads quickly and Jacob jumped back quickly at the vision of his wife standing in the open door of the hotel room with a face full twisted with rage. He’d pulled out so fast that Erik? had gasped. He would have apologized were he not so shocked. He reached out for Ceely but before he could do anything—and really what could he do—she bolted down the hallway.

            He slowly sat on the bed, trembling violently. He couldn’t have run after her if he had wanted. He suddenly felt violently ill and he was naked, not to mention she had caught him balls deep in another man. Not many excuses for that. “Oh honey, I slipped” didn’t seem like it would fit the bill here.

            “Let me guess, you’re married.” Jacob looked up to Erik who was putting his clothes on in a way that screamed “controlled rage”.

            “Yeah.” Jacob put his face in his hands and released a breath that sounded suspiciously like a sob. He was shocked when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up and Erik actually seemed like his anger had dissipated. Maybe he even looked like there was some pity in his eyes.

Great.     

“You seem too nice to be doing shit like this, man. And I never say shit like this to hook-ups. You seem genuinely good, though. Maybe it’s best this way.” The man turned on his heel and left Jacob to himself. He was a bit stunned by that statement. The guy had no idea what Jacob stood to lose over his stupidity.

***

The longest drive in his life was the ten miles it took to get from downtown Atlanta to his home in Decatur. Everything he could say ran through his head, but he had never been a good liar. Unless you counted the one he told every time he said he was straight.

He knew his wife had suspected and affair. They’d been married a year and he had only had sex with her enough for them to get pregnant with their baby boy. She was his first girl, and he had managed to get her to wait til after they were married. He hated it. He felt more guilty having sex with her than any time he had been with a man. Yet he could not ever be with a man. There was no way.

She had become expectant after marriage, though and had been trying to instigate more intimacy but he used the pregnancy as an excuse then was happy for the six week rule the doctor placed after the birth. But now that Brandon was seven months old, he’d run out of excuses.  Ceely had obviously gotten the right idea, although he was certain that she had not guessed the correct sex of his partners.

If only he could have the one person he had always wanted. His life should be so different. But he would not ever regret his son. Brandon was his joy. His life. The only thing his father could not take away from him, even if he was a gay man living a lie.

He smiled thinking of his son. He just wanted to hug the little bundle tight and that would at least make what was about to come bearable. He hated that Ceely would not want a divorce so at best he would get every other weekend. It devastated him to think he wouldn’t see the baby every day.

When he pulled up to his house, first he noticed that his wife’s car was missing. He rushed into the house, slamming the door, while dialing Ceely’s number on his phone. Straight to voicemail.

He ran into their room and the closets were empty. He supposed he shouldn’t be surprised but how could she just take the baby. A check of the baby’s room confirmed that even Brandon’s clothes were missing. Jacob wandered to the crib feeling numb, leaning on the rails. That’s when he spotted the note. He reached for it with trembling hands and could not stop the loud sob that escaped when he read the words written on the paper.

Don’t even bother looking. You’ll never find us.

BLURBAGE!

You Can Still See The Stars In Seattle
by Kade Boehme
Releasing: March 15, 2013
 

When Andrew Riley arrives in Seattle to work at an underprivileged school at the request of his cousin, Amanda, he finds himself sharing accommodations with her current boyfriend—his estranged high school friend, Jacob Carter. Living in close quarters and working with Jacob at the school brings Andy’s old crush on Jacob back to the surface, but for the same reasons then as now he can’t let it be known: Jacob is straight, very uptight in his morals, and now involved with Andy's cousin. 

Jacob Carter has loved Andy his whole life, but nothing scared him more than when he thought Andy might return that love. Denying his feelings broke his heart, but there was no way Jacob could accept his homosexuality. So he did what all good southern boys were brought up to do: got married and had a child. Only that led to him cheating, his wife running off with their son, and Jacob trying to atone for his mistakes by living the straight and narrow with Amanda. But with Andrew is back in his life can he keep up the facade? Can finally surrendering to love show him where his future really lies, or will it destroy his chances of ever having his son in his life?

  

Wowzer!

I dont even know what to say to all of the awesomeness that has been going around with the release of Wide Awake. Thanks to the awesomeness of great friends we really got word out and the readers totally did the rest. I'm totally a bestseller now! <3 I'm fangirling over all over you badasses who went out and bought the book and for all of the positive feedback I've received. Not only have I hit bestseller but I even made it in the top 5!

HOLY SHIT!

Y'all make me so happy! And to show how stoked and appreciative I am, I'm going to make an announcement that I wasn't going to make for a minute in lieu of a bit of Wide Awake  spoilerage.

Andy's story is next. 3/15. Save the date :) If y'all keep it up I just may throw the blurb out there soon.

<3k

One More...

One more photo of Mark and Tyler from Wide Awake! I just cant help how much I love these guys haha. 

Mark Riley(L) and Tyler Marcus(R)

<3k

I'm a Tease

Ok. So this novella is comin out this week and I'm really in love with these guys and am hoping that everyone likes their story. Fair warning, it's not as emotional as On The Dock. But that's because it's a totally different type of story with its own brand of angst. So in preparation for their story, Wide Awake, I thought I'd introduce you guys to Tyler and Mark via photo. Then if you read further I've posted an excerpt!

<3 this effing photo! gah! So these are our guys. Mark (r) and Tyler (l). *swoon* They were awesome to write and even funner to look at. Haha. Gah at that smile on Tyler.

Anywho...

And now i give you excerpt love (aka The Prologue):

Prologue

            I couldn’t believe it when I saw him across the room. This man whom I had known my whole life and harboured a crush on for years was across the room from me, in that place of all places. A gay bar.

If he was gay it was news to me. And I was definitely praying he was, had been for a long damn time.

He was as stunning as the last time I had seen him. His tuft of brown hair was looking more fashionably dishevelled in this setting than his typically neatly cropped look that he wore in his uniform. I guess that was to be expected after he left his job months ago, which was also the last time I had seen him. His eyes held a sparkle when he spotted me that I had not seen in them before. And they found mine looking at him from the bar.

            That chance encounter in the club the night before had ended with us in his new studio apartment in midtown Atlanta. I was adjusting my eyes remembering the night before, and had just registered whose bed I was in this morning. A small flush of shame soon turned to a warm need as his hand caressed the small of my back.

            “Good morning, Tyler.” His voice held sleep and I stretched like a cat under his soft caresses of my back then turned to look at him. His green eyes were warm but he looked like he was uncertain as to whether I would bolt now that I was no longer inebriated. I swallowed the small amount of guilt that I was feeling and gave into the fantasy that was this moment. I had wanted to see that sleepy gaze since I realized I was in love with this man five years ago while visiting home from college.

            Five years ago. Four years before he left his wife. The first night I saw a human being and an equal rather than someone who had been a bit of a mystery to me my whole adolescent life.  I think I was probably the only person who still held this man in kind resolve. I hoped that was not the only reason I was in his bed.

            And I could not fathom it because we had never figured out why he left his wife. Everyone had been so busy being angry that they had not realized that this was why the man was so upset that he had up and left behind everything he had known. I guess the road to happiness was a long and complicated one for some people, but for every guilty thought I had about what we had done I had always recognized an innate loneliness in him that made me feel connected to him. Taking away someone’s loneliness was never shameful. And this was him.

Mark Riley.

            I was in Mark Riley’s bed. And that was inexplicably the best thing that had happened in my short life. And he was smiling at me like that.

            I looked at the clock on the bedside table and winced. “More like afternoon, you mean.”

            He laughed gently. “So. Surprise. I’m gay.”

            My look at him was sarcastic. “Well, I think the soreness in my ass is testament to that statement, Mr. Riley.” I meant the Mr. Riley as a joke but he had to stop himself from recoiling. I placed a gentle hand on his chest. “Hey, I was just joshin’ you.”

            “Well, no more Mr. Riley, okay, Ty. I already feel like I just officially proved their mid-life crisis theory.” He rolled onto his back and rubbed his hands over his face.

            “They’re assholes.” I said, pulling his hands from his face and looked into his eyes. Oh those green eyes that were always so serious looked like a weight had been lifted, even in his moment of uncomfort. “You seem so—less serious.”

            “You don’t have to defend me. I know  I made some bad decisions. I just can’t believe you’re here.”

            I huffed and smiled. “Ditto. And besides. I’m 27. I’m not  some kid. And you’re only thirty-eight. I’ve been with older. I am a lawyer. Most of the guys I’ve dated have been other attorneys I’ve worked with.” He looked jealous?

            “Ty, why did you approach me last night? I wouldn’t have freaked at seeing you, but why did you come to me?”

            I blushed. “I’ve had crush on you since my 21^st birthday party.” It was his turn to blush. That night he had had a row with his wife over the alcohol Andy had consumed. It was probably one of a handful of times I had actually seen him at home. One of his ex wife’s biggest complaints was that he was married to the job. He was never home. I only knew of him for the longest time from hearing him mentioned around the home when I was hanging out there.

            I knew he was a cop, and I knew he was high up. He was always busy with some case. The Riley’s always seemed to be fighting about it. On the phone, the few times I’d seen the man in person; it was almost tradition that they disrupt a neighborhood barbeque. Don’t get me wrong, I liked his ex wife, Jackie, but I never had understood their still being married.

 That night Mark had been so flustered and I thought he looked lonelier than anyone I had ever seen. As he was sitting on the swing set in their back yard smoking a cigarette I decided to finally get to know the man. So I took him a beer and sat next to him. He didn’t have his well put-together Detective Mark Riley façade on that night. He was just Mark. In fact that was the night he said to drop the Mr. Riley bit and just call him Mark. We had talked a lot. About my dreams of law school and that he was thinking of leaving the force.

 Three years later he had quit the force, and the next year left his wife without really giving a reason other than saying that it was time. No one understood but I always remembered that night on the swing set and guess I just got it.

            Now, I truly understood. And had benefitted from it, even though no one would really understand my newfound involvement, either.

            “That’s flattering.” He rubbed a finger down my cheek, looking at me like he was surprised.

            Just then my cell phone started blaring.

            I dug in my jeans and he gave my ass a gentle slap, but he stopped looking so playful when I sat bolt upright staring at my phone’s display.

            Shit. “Shit.” I thought it bore verbalizing.

            “Andy?” He sighed. I shushed him as I answered.

            “What’s up, Andy?” I tried not to sound guilty.

            “Dude, fuck that. You’re late! Our moms and your sister are here waiting for you for this lunch that was your idea and you’re the fucker that’s running late.”

            “I know, man. I just got—hung up.” I suck at excuses. Andy just gave a grunt that meant he was smirking.

            “Well tell the flavour of the day to put his dick in his pants, you have family obligations.” And he hung up. I looked over at Mark shame faced.

            “We’re all doing lunch. Me, my family and yours.” I completely understood the guilt playing out on his face because I felt it too.

            Yes. His son, Andy, though four years my junior, is my best friend.