Excerpt:
Jacob
could focus on nothing but the sweat on the skin of the man beneath him and the
way the man’s muscles worked his cock as he slid home into the willing body. It
had been too long. He almost lost it from the moment he breached that hot
entrance. It did not help when the man began to writhe beneath him. He was
obviously a skilled lover if the way he worked those muscles was any
indication.
Jacob
had finally had all he could of simply reveling in the feel of the man’s body.
He was filled with the need to move, to plunder. He began a brutal thrusting.
This was no exchance of love, hell they didn’t even know one another’s names/
This was a brutal taking of what needed to be fulfilled. The demon inside
Jacob.
The
man’s grunt and cries with each inward plunge were delicious and Jacob was not
sure how long he would last if the man kept it up so Jacob reached around and
grasped the man’s hard cock in his hand and stroked him in time with the thrust
of his own hips.
Jacob
loathed these encounters as much as he needed them. He never felt as alive or
as whole as he did when he had a strong, powerful body taking pleasure around
him, and giving pleasure in kind. It was like a high/ But he hated those stolen
moments. He hated that this is all it would ever be. That meeting in a bar, the
hotel rooms, the shower to clean off the freedom before he slipped home to his
cage. A cage of his own design, if he admitted it.
Jacob
closed his eyes and willed the thoughts away as the man beneath him started to
gasp and clench in the throes of orgasm, reeling Jacob quickly along with him.
Jacob saw white and hunched over the man’s backm digging his fingers bruisingly
into the man’s hips as he shot into the condom.
The
lay for a moment, still joined, panting and trying to recover from their bliss.
Jacob tried always tried to steal just one more moment than he should before
the flavor of the night had had enough and bolted. This man – Erik?—was
obviously patient because he reached back and gently rubbed circles on Jacob’s
thighs with warm hands that soothed Jacob and nearly made him weepy.
A
light suddenly cut through the dark. That wasn’t right. Both he and Erik?
turned their heads quickly and Jacob jumped back quickly at the vision of his
wife standing in the open door of the hotel room with a face full twisted with
rage. He’d pulled out so fast that Erik? had gasped. He would have apologized
were he not so shocked. He reached out for Ceely but before he could do anything—and
really what could he do—she bolted down the hallway.
He
slowly sat on the bed, trembling violently. He couldn’t have run after her if
he had wanted. He suddenly felt violently ill and he was naked, not to mention
she had caught him balls deep in another man. Not many excuses for that. “Oh
honey, I slipped” didn’t seem like it would fit the bill here.
“Let
me guess, you’re married.” Jacob looked up to Erik who was putting his clothes
on in a way that screamed “controlled rage”.
“Yeah.”
Jacob put his face in his hands and released a breath that sounded suspiciously
like a sob. He was shocked when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He looked up
and Erik actually seemed like his anger had dissipated. Maybe he even looked
like there was some pity in his eyes.
Great.
“You seem too nice to
be doing shit like this, man. And I never say shit like this to hook-ups. You
seem genuinely good, though. Maybe it’s best this way.” The man turned on his
heel and left Jacob to himself. He was a bit stunned by that statement. The guy
had no idea what Jacob stood to lose over his stupidity.
***
The longest drive in
his life was the ten miles it took to get from downtown Atlanta to his home in
Decatur. Everything he could say ran through his head, but he had never been a
good liar. Unless you counted the one he told every time he said he was
straight.
He knew his wife had
suspected and affair. They’d been married a year and he had only had sex with
her enough for them to get pregnant with their baby boy. She was his first
girl, and he had managed to get her to wait til after they were married. He
hated it. He felt more guilty having sex with her than any time he had been
with a man. Yet he could not ever be with a man. There was no way.
She had become
expectant after marriage, though and had been trying to instigate more intimacy
but he used the pregnancy as an excuse then was happy for the six week rule the
doctor placed after the birth. But now that Brandon was seven months old, he’d
run out of excuses. Ceely had obviously
gotten the right idea, although he was certain that she had not guessed the
correct sex of his partners.
If only he could have
the one person he had always wanted. His life should be so different. But he
would not ever regret his son. Brandon was his joy. His life. The only thing
his father could not take away from him, even if he was a gay man living a lie.
He smiled thinking of
his son. He just wanted to hug the little bundle tight and that would at least
make what was about to come bearable. He hated that Ceely would not want a
divorce so at best he would get every other weekend. It devastated him to think
he wouldn’t see the baby every day.
When he pulled up to
his house, first he noticed that his wife’s car was missing. He rushed into the
house, slamming the door, while dialing Ceely’s number on his phone. Straight
to voicemail.
He ran into their room
and the closets were empty. He supposed he shouldn’t be surprised but how could
she just take the baby. A check of the baby’s room confirmed that even
Brandon’s clothes were missing. Jacob wandered to the crib feeling numb,
leaning on the rails. That’s when he spotted the note. He reached for it with
trembling hands and could not stop the loud sob that escaped when he read the
words written on the paper.
Don’t even bother looking. You’ll
never find us.
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